Lake Placid 3 (2010)

Plot: 3 Monstrous crocodiles terrorize a country lake, leading to a fight against a wildlife scientist, local sheriff and feisty female hunter which makes the WWE look like pansies.

Hmmmm, the original Lake Placid was pretty good. Far from perfect though. The sequel was pretty dull. This third outing is better then part 2 but still could have been so much more. First off lets state this is a made for TV affair. That means the CGI is not Speilberg standard, but having said that, it aint that bad. The crocs are just about ok. You know that they aren't really there but overlook that fact and this is quite fun.

Quick, move the motor!

 The cast are all obviously TV folk. The acting never rises above "Dallas" level but this is ok and you do care about some of them as they each start to get gobbled up by the green giants. Colin Ferguson plays the sheriff and some times you could mistake him for a wooden box but he just about has enough about him to play the hero.

Oooh, I have a splitting headache.

Now, and this is a big now, I watched the UNRATED DVD version. I have also seen the SyFy version. The latter is piss poor. Loads cut out and very little gore. The unrated version has far more gore and a sprinkling of nudity. Much of the nudity is by our own Roxanne Pallett. Formerly off Emmerdale, she set off to the states to make it big in movies. Well she has done. Her arse is massive.

You didn't see that on the farm

The film truddles on, a couple of gators die and the showdown is set up for the big nasty one and the few survivors. It's all good fun and you never tire of seeing the next victim become reptile lunch. The ending sets up Lake Placid 4 which will of course set up Lake Placid 5.

Jesus, he's in everything.

Special mention must go out to  Michael Ironside. He is a legend of shit films and he is always brilliant. Although, granted, he is always Ham Tyler from V in every single film he does but thats fine, Ham Tyler is cool. Sounds like a piece of pork too which is my favourite meat.

All in all it's stupid TV looking affair with bad CGI, gratuitous nudity and wooden acting all round but it's fun with some nice death scenes. Plus I love giant crocs.

Summary:

Great because:

• Big fat crocodiles
• Big fat arses

Crap because:

• Annoying kid dosen't die
• Cheap effects
• Wooden acting

Hamster Rating: 2.5
Gore: 2.5
Scares: 3